Academic Calendar: Mandatory Frugal Holidays & Recesses

Cheap101 Official Academic Calendar: Fiscal Year Schedule

SEMESTER PLANNING: The Art of Counter-Cyclical Purchasing | PROVOST MEMO

Standard university calendars observe conventional civic holidays. At Cheap101, our semesters are organized strictly around seasonal retail clearance markdown cycles, bulk seasonal harvests, and energy conservation milestones.

Fall Semester Milestones

• September 15–22: National “Use Up the Summer Garden Gluts” Week
  Mandatory canning, batch pickling, and vegetable dehydrating. Any student purchasing canned diced tomatoes during this period receives an automatic incomplete.
• October 31 (Midnight): The Great Half-Off Fun-Size Candy Stampede
  Classes canceled on November 1st to allow students to purchase miniature chocolate bars for seventy-five percent off retail.
• November 15: The Great Thermostat Lowering Observance
  Campus heat is capped at 64°F. Students are directed to layer two fleece pullovers and drink warm tap water before requesting auxiliary heating units.

Winter & Spring Terms

• December 26 – January 5: The Post-Holiday Clearance Pilgrimage
  The holy week of frugality. Students sweep big-box aisles for seventy-five to ninety percent off wrapping paper, holiday storage bins, ribbons, and gift tags for the subsequent calendar year.
• January 15–31: “Eat What is at the Back of the Freezer” Fortnight
  No grocery purchases permitted except milk and eggs. Students must consume historical soups, unlabeled casserole blocks from November, and bagged peas buried under ice cubes.
• April 16: The Tax Refund Lockbox Protocol
  Students receiving tax refunds are barred from entering electronics retailers or car dealerships until funds are locked into high-yield accounts or debt principal payments.

Seasonal Clearance Preparedness Station

To survive the December 26th Clearance Pilgrimage, students must maintain proper container storage to protect off-season acquisitions: