🎵 “The Ballad of Ima B. Cheap (and Her Degree in Deals)”

By Ima B. Cheap, Professor of Penny-Pinchin’

[Verse 1]
Well Ima B. Cheap was a budget queen,
Clippin’ those coupons since she was thirteen.
She could sniff out a sale from a mile away,
And reuse foil ‘til it walked away. 🧻

She said, “Folks, I’ve got the frugal knack,
I iron my Ziplocs and I ain’t lookin’ back.
But why should I save all the tricks for me?
Let’s start a school—call it Cheap Degree!” 🎓

[Chorus]
🎶 Welcome to Cheap 101,
Where the savings are high and the tuition’s none!
Get your diploma in Discount Science,
With majors in Thrift and Coupon Compliance!
Forget Ivy League, we’ve got Clearance Racks—
Professor Cheap’s got your wallet’s back!
So grab your binder and a dollar store pen,
Class is in session—let’s save again! 🎶

[Verse 2]
She teaches how to stack deals like a lasagna,
Uses toothpaste for wall art (I kid you not, ya).
Turn old socks into trendy puppets,
And shampoo samples into stocking stuffets! 🎁

She said, “Free doesn’t mean you’re broke or lazy,
It means you’re smart, and maybe a little crazy.
I got a PhD in BOGO math,
And I studied hard on the budget path!” 🧠💸

[Chorus]
🎶 Welcome to Cheap 101,
Where every lesson is a frugal one!
From ramen hacks to birthday perks,
And how to make shoes outta duct tape and shirts!
Forget student loans and fancy dorm beds—
We’ve got yard sale chairs and noodle threads.
So sharpen your scissors and your wit real fast,
Ima B. Cheap is teachin’ class! 🎶

[Bridge]
Now students come from near and far,
Some ride the bus, some push a cart.
They all leave with a degree in deals,
And a wallet fatter than their four-course meals! 🍽️

[Final Chorus]
🎶 So sign up now for Cheap 101,
Where the savings shine brighter than the sun!
There’s no tuition, just good advice—
And maybe a tip on reusing rice! 🍚
‘Cause Ima B. Cheap’s got the heart to give,
And she’ll teach you how the thrifty live.
So don’t you wait, go on and apply—
The best free school that money can’t buy! 🎶